Worldwind

I found out my dad died at 12:37pm. By 615pm I was on a flight to Dayton Ohio. I would fly there to meet my sister and then we drove to Saint Louis Missouri the next morning.
My dad was being cremated and was not being embalmed. So if we wanted to say goodbye we had to do that within 24 hours.
So that is why we were in active mood.
That 6 hours was a worldwind. My head was spinning. I told my sister, my daugthers, and some friends my news. Tried to figure everything out.
Once I got to the airport my head was spinning. I got on my first flight and tried to keep it together but I lost it.
I had gone in the bathroom and seen how red and swollen my eyes were. I thought to myself “I need to wash my face” And then I realized that is what my dad would always say when he did not want anyone to know I had been crying. That caused me to cry even more.
The bathroom was becoming smaller around me so I was trying to make my way back to my seat and just blubbering like a whale. But I really did not care who saw me crying.
It was better for me to let it out than to try to keep it together. And I was totally okay with that.
My second flight was a little better. I pretty much kept it together. I barely slept over the next 5 days. Probably a total of 16 hours. I was surviving on sweet tea and fast food.
I just had to put one foot in front of another. Thats all I could do. I leaned on GOD during that time.