Last week I wrote about being a terrible passenger. Actually it goes deeper than just being a terrible passenger. I have a HUGE fear just being on the road period.
I feel like I am a very cautious driver. And I am even fearful of when I am driving. Not necessarily doubting my driving skills. But fearful of the other drivers more.
I have really tried to dissect this and figure out why I have this fear. And it basically comes down to I have a fear of getting in a car accident that would result in becoming unconscious or unable to speak and being in a Emergency Room with people around me trying to take care of me and saving my life.
As I have shared before because of my gang rape I have a hard time being around crowds. But I have gotten to the point where I can “ease” myself in the environment.
But if I am unconscious and then I wake up and there are people around me that would put me into panic. I have shared before about going into surgery and I had to let the nurse know not to be in my face and to warn me gently when waking me up.
I felt successful because I was able to communicate that to the staff. But in a car accident situation I can’t communicate that. I understand that this is not something I can control. But no matter it is a fear I have.
I pray in time that I can be at rest and know GOD is in control and he has my best in mind when he has a plan for me.
To GOD Be The GLORY. Take Care. Much Love.
