A few weeks back I was at the VA downtown at one of my PE Therapy session. I was on my way to the car after session. It must have been a hard session and I musgt have had the deer in the headlight look because there was a veteran and his wife walking towardes me and he said “Oh It Cant be that bad” In my head so many responses came up:
“I am at the VA surrounded my male veterans of course it is that bad”
“I just got out of therapy where I talked about one of the most traumatizing events in my life, of
“You don’t know me how dare you say that. “
I had to stop those thoughts. And remind myself I do not need to justify, defend or explain anything to anyone.
So instead I say
“Yes it is, You just don’t understand”
I have realized over time that no one is ever going to 100% relate with what I have been through and how I handle it. As humans we all are able to deal with things different
About 10 years ago I had an amazing person in my life that just had a hard time totally understanding my traumas. So I decided to have her write down her Traumas, Dramas, and Llamas in Pajamas.
We got together about a week later and started sharing our list with each other. And that is when I realized that people consider different things as traumas.
For her, a trauma was her dad cheating on her mom and leaving them. To me, trauma is a sexual assault that has happened. So it is not that she is wrong or I am right. It is that we have not gone through the same things and so we have different things to list then each other.
So to that man that wanted to simplify the look on my face. Yes, it could be that bad and no I don’t need to explain why it is that bad. But you know what I am strong enough now to handle it because where I have come from.
To GOD Be The GLORY. Take Care. Much Love
