Forgiveness Letter -Family Friend
Dear Family Friend,
I stop and think that it has been a little over 36 years since the horrific New Years Eve when I was 10 years old.
One part of me sees it as it was so long ago. I have healed and grown so much from that innocent 10-year-old. I have learned to ultimately forgive you for what happened that night. To leave as much of that night where it needs to be in the past. I have grown so much since the first time I wrote you. There is nothing I can do to change that night. But I can learn from it now, now that I am the mother of 2 girls. I can make sure that I protect them the best that I can. To never compromise my daughters over my own selfish ambition.
The other part of me sees it just like it was yesterday. I still have things that I struggle with because of what happened to me so many years ago. I have a hard time getting solid sleep because I hear every noise. I have to sleep with the tv on so that I can muffle out the noises around me. I am very overprotected about who my girls are around. I feel I can be neurotic and over cautious. But I am realizing that these quirks are not that bad of things to have. Because it is my duty and responsibility to protect myself and my girls.
It uses to be that I would think about the New years eve all the time. But I am proud to say I only really think about it for a few weeks in December. It is so freeing to not be bombarded and imprisoned by that horrific event. I can finally say I am moving on past that date. So Family Friend, I do forgive you for what you did. There is nothing I can do to change that night. But I can learn to move on. But I can say that I do hold some resentment toward you. Because I feel since you were drunk that night that you probably have no memory of that night or what you did. I have had to live with that pain for so many years, but you were able to go on with your life. But I can’t sit here and harp on that fact. I got to let it go. Cuz if I don’t I am not hurting or affecting you. I am killing my ability to live my life freely without chains.
So I am letting go of it all and say that I forgive you.
Sincerely & full heart
Dana
